Holy Shit, King Ezekiel Elliott Still Slaughtering NFL Defenses

(Last Updated On: March 4, 2017)

It looked like the steam-rolling Dallas Cowboys were snowballing toward only their second loss all season after Ben Roethlisberger faked a spike and threw a go-ahead touchdown to none other than Antonio Brown with 43 seconds left. But of course on the next/final possession, with nine seconds remaining in the game, Ohio State product Ezekiel Elliott toasted off his 114-yard rushing day with a 32-yard plunge through the gaping Red Sea parted by the league’s arguably most astute offensive line.

As Elliott actually put it, this was indeed a Red Sea parting. Even in the box score, we see the effect of a gaping whole. Per ESPN Stats & Info, “the Steelers watched Ezekiel Elliott average 3.9 yards per rush before contact on 21 attempts.” That’s now eight straight wins for the once-desperate Cowboys behind rookie phenoms (and MVP candidates?) Dak Prescott and Elliott.

On the flip side, King Ezekiel (and his tiger) may be just about the only thing keeping The Walking Dead slightly interesting, which is no simple task in this dreadful 7th season. But even his dreads pale in comparison to the unstoppable juggernaut that is Ezekiel.

King Ezekiel Elliott meme. (Pic: http://ryan.hasaportfolio.com/)
All King Ezekiel Elliott needs is a Tiger and a Football. (Pic: Ryan Fishman)

Keep hammering away, Zeke. There’s plenty of hardware coming your way..