Kristaps Porzingis unicorn meme.

Knicks basketball finally watchable because Porzingis

(Last Updated On: April 7, 2017)

Kristaps Porzingis revolutionizing Knicks basketball

Knicks basketball has been tough for a long time, but it finally feels like we’ve got a Lloyd Christmas chance. Like the oft-reported but rarely spotted Bigfoot, or the eponymous unicorn, Kristaps Porzingis manages to inspire awe, fear and love in equal measures. His on-court brilliance is a thing of beauty, unstoppable by normal means.

This guy is the hero Gotham both deserves and needs. Forget his gritty early years in Sevilla Spanish basketball sleeping on the floor; let’s talk about how this man gave the big ass middle finger to Sam fucking Hinkie and his bullshit Philadelphia 76ers. And how he turned the always lowly Knicks into a watchable basketball team again, a team that once considered Maurice Ndour for a prime role.

Good thing Porzingis’ brother is is his co-agent – because all Hinkie does is draft young big men or Rookie of the Year guards and then trade them or bench them forever. Zingy’s agent Andy Miller refused an interview with the Sixers, and we can guess brother-slash-co-agent Janis Porzingis was having none of Sam Hinkie’s garbage. I can wholeheartedly agree with the decision, considering I’ve got Knicks blood and Hinkie is like the ultimate ADHD kid playing NBA 2K16 franchise mode and cleaning house every year. I would know the latter, as that would be me.

On a side note, rumor has it that NBA 2K16 decreased Blake Griffin’s hands rating from 97 to 77. Ouch.

So hail to the mighty Godzingis (check our GQ’s Q&A with Porzingis). Long may he live in New York, and embarrass Philly and its neglected fans for many years to come.

Kristaps Porzingis unicorn meme knicks basketball.
Kristaps Porzingis is rare but magically changing Knicks basketball.