New York Knicks leaning heavily on Porzingod

(Last Updated On: September 29, 2017)

The New York Knicks have found a gem in Kristaps Porzingis, gloriousness of which we’ve covered multiple times here at Spleaze. The 7-foot-3 Latvian is like a rare Pokemon card or a photo of Billy Zane with hair – incredibly hard to find, and a true joy to stumble across.

This guy is the hero NYC needs, but I’m honestly not sure if we even deserve this Latvian warrior beanpole. Dude has seen, done, slept in and eaten some shit, and he’s doing the right thing with his NBA opportunity, taking the family along with him for the ride and letting his brother be his agent.

Telling Sam Hinkie to go fuck himself was the icing on the cake. Once I found out they wouldn’t even give Philadelphia a physical, I was all in on team Porzingis. I’d even consider letting Kristaps sleep with my woman, something I’d previously only ever said about Eli and Henrik.

If this is what basketball love feels like, sign me up to a long term deal, please.

New York Knicks Porzingod meme.
New York Knicks have a higher being in Kristaps Porzingis.